MEM mother is the authority figure, even in all things religion.
Mother will comment on MEM not following the commandments, such as honor thy father and mother, whenever the enmeshed son threatens to pull away from mom.
Honoring is interpreted as blindly following her every whim.
Her MEM's partner is constantly under fire for not being Christlike, not obeying commandments, being judgmental, not following the bible, and so on. Always with her as the victim of the vicious partner of her MEM. The mother alone knows how to be a perfect Christian, only she has no flaws and is allowed to judge. She is only motivated buy pure love for her son and wants what is best for him and only she knows what is best and even what God thinks is best for him.
Once I overheard a conversation of the daughter of my MEM's mother calling to ask what to do with her own daughter. Instead of listening and then suggesting this daughter pray about it, she said she would pray and let her know what to do. The MEM mother is always the middle man. She raised her children to think that you need her in order to know what God wants you to do.
A MEM mother discourages a personal relationship between her children, especially the MEM, and God. She needs to be in control and asking God for help might lead to a different outcome than she anticipates. Keeping control of all outside relationships is the only way to control the MEMs thinking and acting.
Hiding behind God and using God as a weapon also alleviates the mother from any responsibility. Her control is hidden behind a God who wants it, not her. A God who demands a son to honor his mother. In order to please God you must be obedient to your parents, namely the mother.
Reminds me of the saying: “Don't shoot the messenger if you don't like the message.” Mother is simply the messenger, the message is from God and better be obeyed.
A MEM mother believes herself to have the right to receive revelation for her son and those in her family. She is the one whom she believes knows best what everybody's needs are.
A MEM is not allowed to have a close relationship with anybody but his mother.
My MEM did not know how to connect to deity. He would pray and feel that he received an answer but if it was in any way contrary to what he intuitively knew his mother would want, he would talk himself out of it before he even got off his knees. He would always come back to following his mother's wishes for him rather than God's.
Being the all knowing, all powerful mother is what a MEM mother enjoys. She has complete control over all aspects of her son's life and can play him like a puppet. To break free from this abuse and control takes years, if a MEM is willing to go through the pain of realizing that mother does not know best and mother does not love me, and mother does not have what's best for me in mind, only what is best for her.